I am no longer a citizen of West Virginia. I am so utterly disgusted and appalled. One of the last remnants of the Confederacy has gained even more steam in its biggest fan base. The ghost of Andrew Jackson will never die.
http://www.wvgazette.com/News/200802280761
I am in Blazing Saddles. West Virginia is Rock Ridge. The governments are exactly the same, with Democrats and Republicans in tow. Unfortunately, there is no Sheriff Bart. There is no Waco Kid.
I'm sure many a West Virginian unleashed their shotguns into the air. Conway Twitty boomed on the radio, while the hooch flowed like rain. Many a sister were inappropriately touched by their brother, and many a daughter and wife were beaten from sheer glee from a drunken father. The economy was still a festering rectum, but it didn't matter.
NASCAR is officially here. Congrats to the monkeys in government with another perfect distraction. Not only do we have 850,000 churches, good ol' Mountaineer football (brilliantly played by the string-pullers), and not an African-American in sight.
We have proven once again that West Virginia is a fantastic place to live... if you're a white heterosexual Christian.
Conservatism, in its most annoying form, is alive and well. As such, I quote the film referenced above. And this is what has happened...
"Now I don't have to tell you good folks what's been happening in our beloved little town. Sheriff murdered, crops burned, stores looted, people stampeded, and cattle raped. The time has come to act, and act fast. I'm leaving."
That's right. I'm leaving. I've mentally packed my bags and hitting the road. I may work here, sleep here, and buy groceries here... but I'm not here. I've tuned out Toby Keith and all the other bigotry the "good ol' boys" have to offer.
My citizenship to a state is officially up for auction. It won't take much to sway me. Believe me.
Any takers?
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