Twilight (2008)

I'm not a big MTV guy. I think the concept of music videos is a good idea, but it never really pans out. I'm akin to the Lewis Black theory on this, so pick up one of his albums to see what all the fuss is.

Putting the letters "MTV" in front of it made me cringe a little. That and the very stupid "you brought a snack" line in the trailer. I expected loads of overacting, and a bad script.

I kept my expectations in the gutter. I haven't read the book, either.


However, I really liked it.

I won't do the usual lengthy review... just a few hits and misses.


Catherine Hardwicke did a fantastic job directing this film. Her vision is clearly laid out in each frame. Instead of providing simplistic dribble to satisfy teens, she created a beautifully drawn film. The studios are very, very stupid not to have her aboard for the sequel. I'd rather wait an extra year and have a great film... than to mass produce shit.

The script has problems. See the quoted line above. The vampires aren't scary, nor are they meant to be. They don't have the Hammer fangs, the Tod Browning menace, or the Coppola eroticism. This is a romance story. If you're searching for a parallel, try John Badham's Dracula (1979)... another underrated film. The story itself is unique and places itself well in the genre.

Overall, the acting was good. Robert Pattinson (veteran of "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire") and Kristen Stewart work well together. The wisdom of Peter Facinelli in the "father" role was a scene stealer.



So, what's the beef? One word. James.

Cam Gigandet plays this guy named "James," who's assumedly the primary antagonist. The look is a mix between Fabio and
He and the character flat out blow, and I'm saying that in the nicest way possible. Vampires are supposed to be intimidating.

I felt intimidated, the same level of intimidation I felt watching Blazing Saddles. And that pisses me off, because I love Blazing Saddles.

This ran through my head when I was watching the film. So memorizing was the idiocy of this character, so complete was the mediocrity... I had to see it again. I had to remind myself to tune James out whenever he leapt onto the screen.

His screen time is fortunately small, but it's something I can't overlook.

The Hollywood executive who approved this actor for this character in this script should be arrested.

...and we wonder why the French lopped off the cake queen's head.

It conjured in me the same rage when watching the Schumacher Batman films, Gods and Generals, and the TV show Charmed.


I'm better now.


I saw it twice, and I appreciated it more. Vampire films almost always have a good score, and Twilight is no exception. The music added a level of atmosphere without damaging the integrity of the assumed realism (however much you can get in this genre) of this film.

Twilight is a date movie, and I heard the girls (and one guy) in the theater swoon when Robert Pattison gave his best Rudolph Valentino impression.

If you go see this (and you should), don't expect a scare.


Oh, and tell the annoying kid in front of you to turn off the damned cell phone.

8/10.